hmmm. 2mmrw i'm going back 2 my student life again.. not looking forward. wish i had more holidays

a quick summary on last week

mon: was really bz...had 2 tests which i really wanted 2 finish b4 easter break. n somehow things just pilled up which made me rant 2 my frenz in studios. ranting bout my disorganised flat. my flatmates. bcoz it just felt like all i did was run around. so they advised me to move out from my current flat bcoz i'm unhappy. n they even got the list of studios available and showed me some place. i was quite touched bt their effort n so i promised them i would seriously consider it.

so i talked to my homegroup ppl who are wiser. n they did say it's not practical cos then i would have to pay double rent, n ya other stuff. n siqin told me her experience at her place n how she dealt wif it. that helped heaps.it started 2 change my thinking. n this easter fri service helped too...i think it made me realise tat i'm not perfect either n that Jesus died for them too. n thursday nite bible study helped too. we did by recreating the atmosphere of the parables to make it mean stg to us. bcoz so often we read parables like'oh yep' without the moral of the story really hitting us. it made me realise hey, what makes me think i' have it all sorted? what makes me think i'm better than my flatmates? what makes me think my way of living is better than theirs? y am i so negative bout everything? i am no better than them at all.

n fri, my flatmates gave me easter eggs. that part also changed things. it made me c thier good points suddenly. like their good points r like amplified in front of me. N when at last minute notice i couldn't go flat shopping bcoz i ahd sleep over, they helped me buy stuff i needed too. N we had our flat meeting on sat afternoon. so divided out duty list for good. n money stuff. shud b ok now. duty list is out. i'm in charge of toilet for 4 weeks. n i nearly died yesterday just cleaning it. so much filth. n my whole body hurts now. ouch..n they dun mind me cooking stir fry all the time bcoz that's the only thing i know how 2 cook. tho i did say sorry for not knowing 2 cook other stuff. they're understanding ppl :)

n fri nite sleep over at sharon's church frenz helped too. christine was leading devotion n she said that God has put u where u r meant 2 b. for good? can't remember did she say for good but anyway, it hit me that mayb where i am at my flat is where i'm suppose 2 b. 2 try 2 b the light to them. not b the sulking gurl. n she said that we shud b ppl who encourage each other n build each other up. all these r not new stuff for a lot of christian ppl. but it gave me new pespective on thinking. it made me realise that for the past few days i've just been so negative n not positive. hardly the type of person God wants His children 2 b.

so i came out of easter weekend with decisions: i wasn't gonna move out. i'm gonna stay put n try 2 b a good testimony to them. or if i can't, i'm gonna change my thinking bout duties. like it'serving God. not them. tough but shud b ok. i'm gonna remember their good point more than their bad. dun let the bad points poison me of their goodness. which will help me love them more hopfully. i'm having this peace now. i dunno whether it's got 2 do with the 5 day break that i had n the movies i watched. but im sure God has given His peace 2 me as well.

On another note, this year's Good friday has been diff from the past 2 years. past 2 year was like"yay holiday" and that's it. ntg more meaning to it. but this year. i'm actually aware in my mind that it's bcoz of Jesus. n friday'service  was painful. i kept feeling a  huge lump on my throat n this burning feeling in my eyes. but i'm like'lishawn don't cry don't make a  fool of urself'. the whole event leading to the cross came aLIVE again. remembering salvation is greater than creation. God's love poured out for us. His blood took away our sins. Knowing my flat situation is ntg compared 2 the suffering He had to go thru.

after service on fri, went to P&P's hse for lunch. it was a really cool time! made pizza n pancakes! my 1st time ever doing this stuff. n i think i amused everyone with my lack of culinary skills. but it was really awesome doing these stuff with ppl who can guide u doing it knowing u won't burn the place down. esp when i was filling in 2 cup of self raising flour. i took the spoon n put in bit by bit n it was so messy. jasmine was like"lishawn u do it like this". *put the whole cup into the packet and scoop it out*. tada!. i was like "ooohhhh"....learnt stg new. hehe. so it was a educational afternoon. n we watched resident evil 3 while eating pizza. hahaa. random eh? but that what they rented. n all the gross stuff while we were having lunch..hmmm..

n jasmine invited me to her place for dinner! haha. sooo nice. she made roast pork n apple crumble n roast vege! yummmmmmm......alvin n jasmine r such a nice couple :)nxt time when i can drive i must remember 2 b like alvin. who shows his love to ppl by fetching ppl n sending ppl like me to the sleepover place even tho it's double the distance from his hse. plus i forgot to take my key and he had 2 double back to get it. sigh..lishawn u r sooo forgetful..

n i ate heaps this week!! on sunday we had a combine flat dinner out at the borg? it's a pub n restaurant.. n we waited an hour an a half for our food!! haha. it's funny. so we got free bread and dips and free desserts!! haha. it's a really long time for dinner. but then it prob is what God intended it to b. so that we can spend more time with each other which is a time we din usually get. it was a good time of laughter n talking :)my apple crumble was really yum....but they shud hav given more ice cream.

my fren is going for back surgery 2mmrw. siqin would know who. everybody's been praying for her. thank God for all the support she's been getting. OCF wouldn't be the same without her for a while.

i think that's all for now. bye bye hols sob sob...